First, I'd like to say that I have an amazing fellowship of believers, and that the adults in this group are the best. Listen to older people any time you can. Don't speak, just listen and think.
Several Sabbath's ago, I had absolutely nothing to do. This was a combination of the only thing on my list being homework, which I don't do on the Sabbath (Thank You, Father, for the Sabbath!), and my boyfriend not being here (Oh yes, that was a recent official stamping with Anaro. Duh, right?). He was sick, and left after the service. So here I am, it's cold outside, I've already cleaned up as much as I can, and the couch looks inviting. The sun was setting, but families were still here conversing, which I love. At first, I sat there and pondered texting with someone the remainder of the evening, but the conversation caught my ear, and didn't let go.
There were many things discussed in this room, most if not all of them biblical, but the one that truly made an impression on me was something Mr. Fine (name changed to protect the innocent) was telling my dad. He was saying that not everyone gets noticed, not everyone is given a message, not everyone is rewarded or punished. We have the extreme cases, the people who were fulfilling all of Yah's will for their lives, and the ones that were doing the exact opposite. We don't hear of Joe Shmoe getting a pat on the back for just making it. We have a book full of the greats and full of the evil. Of course Mr. Fine did not use these precise words, but I'm giving you the basics.
Listening to this, an analogy formed. It might have helped that I was in my second semester of college at the time, and had little else on my mind, but the analogy that really gave this meaning to me was one of school. At a school, the principle is in charge, and the teachers are his disciples. At a school, you have three types of people: the people who try constantly and work really hard to get the best grades they possibly can, the people who go along forgetting the time AND the homework, and the people who coast through getting average grades and making average impressions. Of these people, who do you think gets noticed? Who gets sent to the principle's office? Who gets rewarded?
Last week, I got my personal packet from Phi Theta Kappa, holding my certificate, a membership pin (it's magnetic!), special savings offers at their store, scholarship information, and even a tri-fold on special rates I could get with Geico car insurance (I'm already 'in good hands' ;). Spreading out all of the packets' contents onto my bed, I smiled. I put my certificate on our fridge (it needs a frame). I wore that gold pin that just has to be hideously ugly. When my siblings pointed and said, "What's that?," I replied, "A pin I got from my school for being smart." Mmmhm, I was proud of myself, and happy to be rewarded.
Also last week, I went to a piano lesson after not having one in 4 weeks. I looked at my chart and saw that I had practiced maybe a total of 8-9 days. I did not smile, and I was not proud of myself. I didn't get a pin either.
Applying this analogy to all aspects of my life, I wondered where I would be most rewarded, and most disciplined. School, obviously, was one that I didn't need to work on. Sitting down at the piano in our cold basement was. Being there for friends was easy. Giving my family the same attention wasn't. Succeeding in my work environment was going wonderfully. ... Knowing His word as much as I know the shelves at the library... I don't even know if I'm passing right now. I saw where in my life I was getting noticed, and where I was coasting through. The biggest pain was seeing where I'm failing. I hate failing.
Relying on once a week sit downs with my boyfriend and our Bibles isn't going to get me a gold star. Listening to and once in a blue moon participating in our discussions on Sabbath isn't either. I know there are excuses of, "I have school, homework, and work," "I'm just tired now," "I need *me* time," and "... I have a headache." Then there is my dad. He goes to work... gosh darn early. He comes home to a house full of 8 kids and their noise. He reads the parasha TWICE a week, and I believe the haftora once. He studies the commentary and weighs their points of view. And he remembers it for Saturdays. I know, amazing. HE, my friends, gets a medal AND a trophy. He gets rewarded. He *is* rewarded; with knowledge, wisdom, discernment, and respect. My dad is an A+ student.
This analogy can be a useful tool. Putting myself and what I do into one of three categories is encouraging. I'm so used to seeing why I don't do well in something is because I'm devoting myself in doing amazingly in something else. Thinking of all the average Israelites that didn't make it into our stories, our histories, pushes me. It helps me decide if I'm 1. Passing 2. Succeeding or 3. Failing. It makes me wonder if I'm getting noticed. It makes me wonder even more if I'm getting noticed for the right reasons. According to our histories, the Father doesn't spend all of His time with the coasters. He warns those straying, and He blesses those achieving. Be blessed, my friends.
